10 Things Your Father Forgot To Tell You

Happy Fathers Day to all the daddy’s of the world. I’d like to start by saying my father is legend to me. The absolute best compliment I’ve ever gotten is when someone says “you act/look just like your father”. my father epitomizes a gentle heart and strengthened resolve. I can only hope to match that. My unyielding thirst for knowledge was passed down through him.

Some of you weren’t so lucky. Manhood is a tough thing. There are standards, boundaries, rules that apply. A lot of you missed them for whatever reason….here are the cliff notes.

1. Respect is a reciprocal thing. In order to get it, it must be given. Only good things can happen within these boundaries. Step out of the circle of respect and chaos is sure to erupt in some form or fashion.
2. No one is going to take care of you past a certain age. Everything your parents have been telling you thus far was to prep you for a solo run at life. I know you’ve seen the failures…you don’t want to go that route. 30 years old at home with momma? fail. Stop asking for handouts, their nest egg isn’t yours. The retirement money doesn’t belong to you, junior.
3. Travel. Out of the state. Out of the country. It’ll broaden your small minded view on life all while learning cultures you never knew existed except for on tv. Women vary by region, state, and country with different mindsets than your high school sweetheart. If you are still single, relocate. You’ll be mildly surprised at the difference in the attitudes of women of other area codes.
4. Invest. Remember “he who has the most toys wins”? Well, those toys cost. A lot. Mutual funds, CD’s, Stocks (get a financial planner early kid).
5. Your Word. If it comes out of your mouth, then DO IT. Mean it and never go back on it. People will respect you on your word alone in some cases.
6. Babies. This is a no brainer. Keep it in your pants or use a condom if you aren’t ready to be a daddy. How do you know you aren’t ready to be a daddy you ask? If you can’t support yourself. meaning: If you can’t provide your own shelter, food or clothing, what makes you think you can care for an infant whose solely dependent upon you for continuing to live? Babies require sacrifice of your livelihood. Sending the baby to grandma for days on end is shirking YOUR responsibilities.
7. Never raise your hand to a woman. If you lucked up and got an psycho aggressive bi-polar crazy chick, therapy IS NOT going to help. Run away from that relationship like someone just fired a starter pistol.
8. Public drunkenness is not cool. You look like an idiot because you are an idiot. Maintain your dignity. Women like dignity.
9. A woman is going to leave you or cheat on you if your sex game isn’t up to par. Oh, she’s patient and will wait it out a bit to see if you follow instructions and if there’s any improvement, but rest assured she’ll be on the clock for some quality dizznik. Don’t be one of those guys we laugh at behind your back. Because there’s another thing: she will tell everyone just how bad you are. it’s a damn shame. But it’s true. Yeah, she might not tell the world, but she’s got at least one confidant that knows your sex game is subpar.
10. So. you’ve got yourself together. Your career’s going well, you’ve got nice man toys, you’ve got a great lady and baby makes three. Congratulations, it’s not over. The knowledge, the hard work, the perseverance now needs to be poured into your child. If you allow someone else to teach your child about life, you tripped up right at the finish line. If your child is a failure it’s because YOU failed that child, no one else. Prepare your son or daughter to sidestep all of the hardships and struggles that you went through. Make it easier for them. After all, they are your legacy. Teach them everything, but place a timeline on that gift of knowledge. Too many times have I seen parents rearing their preteen kids for some adult type circumstance when the kid should be playing with other kids and toys. A prime example of this failure: kids running around an all adult party seeing things they shouldn’t. Puberty, adolescence, adulthood have their place and are fundamental for a child’s psyche. don’t ruin that.

If you were lucky enough to have been blessed with a father to teach you some of these things, then by all means call him up and thank him for making you a better individual.